"What Is Stress? Stress is the emotional and physical strain caused by our response to pressure from the outside world."
So why am I stressing? Well, simply pressure from the outside world. I say simply not meaning I have no stress in my life, I say simply because all the stress I have is all revolved around the pressures I feel from work, church, roommates, friends, BOYS, and just life. According to the web, it is common for individuals to experience "overloaded" situations. I used to think that overloading was caused by dramatic events such as divorce, death, illness, loss of job, etc. Then I came to college and threw my care-free go-lucky glasses out the door. I saw this life where I couldn't just frolic and play. I couldn't skip school and gets A's. I had to go to class, work to live, do homework, and vegetating on a couch eating bon bons and watching my 26 television shows was a no-go. So did I ever stress before coming to college? My bet is not really. I am sure I had little times of stress with a project, poster, or paper due. But to be honest, I never let myself stress. If it took effort, I skipped it, or found the easiest way out of it. Future college students- I have some bad news: College is hard. Not like trying to get a boys attention hard, or learning to do laundry hard. I mean HARD. It takes more brain power then you used all 15-19 years before college combined. Don't even try to think about it, it will hurt.
(Fourth of July, last ward wrap up in spring, hanging with elders, RA's wedding)
My advice, let yourself stress. Do not take the easy road out of life. You may love the short cuts, I sure did!, but ever short cut you're taking will only lead you to a dead end in a few years. Don't try to be all cool and take the easy road. Take the path less traveled by. Work hard. I regret it. You have no idea how much. I did a minimal amount of effort and did pretty well, I mean I wasn't a 4.0+ like my older sisters, I got a 3.7 to end with, but let me tell you how this all turns out. Those who work hard and get 4.0's in high school KNOW HOW to work. They come to college with an understanding of how they specifically respond to stress, and they have developed strong work habits in and out of the classroom. I, Jennifer A. Baker, am a slacker. I slacked and skipped and slept my way through high school, I still got a 3.7 and got into BYU, but let me tell you something. My sisters, and all those other hard workers, have 3.8-4.0 in college. Us slackers, well my GPA is a 2.6 (if that). A 2.0 is probation, so I am drowning in deep raging waters. Don't think wearing a life jacket and learning to swim is a waste of time. Everyone ends up in the ocean, and you may have leaned on everyone else but yourself before, but this ocean is big enough that you're gonna need to learn how to make it alone. Study, Stress. More importantly, learn how your body reacts to stress and how you can either avoid it, or overcome it. (All stress can not be avoided, sometimes you have to fight battles you never wished would come upon you.) So, What Stress Is, is OUR response to pressures. Work, school, relationships, and church pressuring you, choose to react. Don't try to avoid it, doing so will cause "overloaded" stress. My final advice is this: No matter what your age, or place in life, please choose to learn how your body responds to pressures from the world. No matter how big or small, they matter. Never let your mind convince you that any pressure is too small to worry about. Later down the road, you will look back and wish you had recognized and responded to those pressures.
(dress up, sleepover, being crazy, fake riding a motorcycle.)
What does any of this have to do with anything? I will tell you- I have been STRESSED to the MAX the past couple months. Every thing in my life has seemed to explode without any prior warning. I found myself broke, jobless, starving, depressed... you name it, I was feeling it. I had to do something. I had to live, I had to eat. No more could I just pawn off of my parents to give me everything I needed. I had to work for my life and my happiness. So what did I do, I asked for help, but I worked hard. I applied to many-a-jobs and got my full plate of rejections. Did I give up, did I go home crying to my mommy and ask for some icecream? I wish! I would have if I were closer to home, but I am obviously not close to home. I got mad, I got strong, wiped my hands, shook it off, and decided to stand. (See Rascal Flatts song "Stand" for further inspiration.) I eventually got my old job back (miscommunication got the best of me), got paid (after a month of working), had a house, and gave up on going places with friends.
(hanging with elders, middle of the night denny's (I didn't buy anything! promise.), best friend comes in town, roommate pictures.)
Yes, I gave up middle of the night trips to Denny's, concerts around Utah to see my friend's band, meals at Wendy's, movies on the weekends, and dates. Yes, I gave up dates. (Once you get to college, you will see how dates become your sanity.) You have to sacrifice to make do. Yeah, of course I miss my careless spending doing whatever I want. But I am becoming responsible. I work a full-time, real (lifeguarding is not a real job, don't kid yourself) job. I make my own meals, do my own l aundry. I don't go out with friends, go dancing, or go out to eat... I sit in my apartment and make do, and fun, with what I have. Invite friends over for a movie? Sure, its free, and you already have the movie, and hopefully the friends. (WARNING: According to signs on University Parkway, if you've got friends you can live in Glenwood. But apparently you have to have friends to live there. The sign says "Got friends?" So if you don't have friends... Too bad.) Now, if you are lacking in the friend department, give me a call, I too am lacking in the friend department. I moved into Alta cause you don't have to have friends to live there, you make friends. (And its cheap). yesss.
(17th ward opener, flying high with the elders.)
Anyways- enough of random side tracks.. I am stressed, ok? I am overwhelmed, and I am overloaded. Unlike a cake in the o ven, I can't burn. Unlike bread in the freezer for too long, I can't get freezer burn. Unlike a computer, I can't crash. But I sure can randomly break down into tears in the middle of a work meeting while everyone stares at me wondering what the heck is going on in my life, and I sure can sit in my apartment and eat nasty old icecream and watch the disney channel and I desperately hope for someone to call. Its perfectly alright to do that... I think.
(saying goodbye to skousen, a picture i already used, hanging with the elders, missing david.)
Just in case you don't believe me... I will try to type up a simple outline of my common day.
Wake up at 8:00. Get dressed, ready for work, clean up from the previous night, possibly eat breakfast or grab something to go.
Work starts promptly at 9:00, or if you want to overachieve and have a successful career, the first step starts at 7:00, and work starts at 8:00.
While at work, you get no real breaks. You just work. For 6-8 hours (depending on the project or day). During this day I have 1 - 3 work meetings where if I am lucky I get a ride to. If not, I walk 20ish minutes across the BYU campus and around a million EFY kids and pregnant women, to get to the meeting. Meanwhile the outside temperature has radically increased and it is hot outside. Even people, like me, who don't sweat begin dripping of nasty salty crap. Anyways, you work hard on about 5 different intense projects until they are about to drain you of all existence JUST to hear you have to do it all over again because the head honchos decide they want it in a different format. Its alright that they do that, afterall, they are just trying to have an effective Literacy project that will be helpful and a success, but it does get a little hard on the brain.
Approximately 3:00 pm, I leave from work.
If I leave at 3:00, I head to physical therapy at 3:30 for both of my shoulders who have so much wrong with them that I might as well have them removed. (I have done physical therapy for 9 months, and have had the shoulder pain for over a year, and there has been about 10% progress if that.) I am there for around 2 hours before all the exercises, therapy, electrical stimulation, deep heat, and moist heat, stretches and ice have finished their job. Then I ...
Drive home.
I will then try to make dinner, maybe. There is always cleaning to do. There is always work email to answer. New facebook notification (ok, so not any more. no one talks to me on facebook anymore. its sad.) There are homework assignments I need to work on for the class I got an incomplete in. There is church responsibilities. There are forms to be completed. Paperwork to be done. Groceries to be gotten. There are last minute work changes to be made. I can be found watching some tv while doing a million other things. I also have family gatherings that tend to occur. And sometimes friends need me. Rarely, but it happens.
Ok, so laugh. It doesn't seem that bad. But let me ask you this: Do you see anywhere on my daily schedule a time to breathe? I didn't think so.
11:59 pm breathe
12:00 am Drift off to dream land have have terrifying nightmares (or even better, perfect dreams where you wake up and realize that real life is the nightmare).
And start all over again.
Oh yeah, and I forgot to add in there when I break down into tears every hour on the hour. Ok ok. I am not that religious about crying, but it happens.
Wake up at 8:00. Get dressed, ready for work, clean up from the previous night, possibly eat breakfast or grab something to go.
Work starts promptly at 9:00, or if you want to overachieve and have a successful career, the first step starts at 7:00, and work starts at 8:00.
While at work, you get no real breaks. You just work. For 6-8 hours (depending on the project or day). During this day I have 1 - 3 work meetings where if I am lucky I get a ride to. If not, I walk 20ish minutes across the BYU campus and around a million EFY kids and pregnant women, to get to the meeting. Meanwhile the outside temperature has radically increased and it is hot outside. Even people, like me, who don't sweat begin dripping of nasty salty crap. Anyways, you work hard on about 5 different intense projects until they are about to drain you of all existence JUST to hear you have to do it all over again because the head honchos decide they want it in a different format. Its alright that they do that, afterall, they are just trying to have an effective Literacy project that will be helpful and a success, but it does get a little hard on the brain.
Approximately 3:00 pm, I leave from work.
If I leave at 3:00, I head to physical therapy at 3:30 for both of my shoulders who have so much wrong with them that I might as well have them removed. (I have done physical therapy for 9 months, and have had the shoulder pain for over a year, and there has been about 10% progress if that.) I am there for around 2 hours before all the exercises, therapy, electrical stimulation, deep heat, and moist heat, stretches and ice have finished their job. Then I ...
Drive home.
I will then try to make dinner, maybe. There is always cleaning to do. There is always work email to answer. New facebook notification (ok, so not any more. no one talks to me on facebook anymore. its sad.) There are homework assignments I need to work on for the class I got an incomplete in. There is church responsibilities. There are forms to be completed. Paperwork to be done. Groceries to be gotten. There are last minute work changes to be made. I can be found watching some tv while doing a million other things. I also have family gatherings that tend to occur. And sometimes friends need me. Rarely, but it happens.
Ok, so laugh. It doesn't seem that bad. But let me ask you this: Do you see anywhere on my daily schedule a time to breathe? I didn't think so.
11:59 pm breathe
12:00 am Drift off to dream land have have terrifying nightmares (or even better, perfect dreams where you wake up and realize that real life is the nightmare).
And start all over again.
Oh yeah, and I forgot to add in there when I break down into tears every hour on the hour. Ok ok. I am not that religious about crying, but it happens.
(bidding farewell to adam right before the mtc, seeing my best buddy dustin, harry potter midnight showing, alpine with old friends.)
Lesson learned:
I never learned how to work or deal with stress. Therefore, real life is HARD. I still don't have a real work habit (its coming along... i think) and I still have not the slightest clue how to deal with stress. Right now, crying is my best option. (In reality, it is one of the worst and least productive options.)
Now, your job is to do this. Respond if you wish as to anything you found particularly.. interesting? in this post. OR you can simply (here goes that word again) post either your suggestions, or an experience you've had where stress has gotten the best of you. I tell you my friends and family! THE POSSIBILITIES ARE ENDLESS. (ok so not necessarily, but you get my drift.)
Anyways, thats all from this teenage drama queen. More confessions to come.
- J
I never learned how to work or deal with stress. Therefore, real life is HARD. I still don't have a real work habit (its coming along... i think) and I still have not the slightest clue how to deal with stress. Right now, crying is my best option. (In reality, it is one of the worst and least productive options.)
Now, your job is to do this. Respond if you wish as to anything you found particularly.. interesting? in this post. OR you can simply (here goes that word again) post either your suggestions, or an experience you've had where stress has gotten the best of you. I tell you my friends and family! THE POSSIBILITIES ARE ENDLESS. (ok so not necessarily, but you get my drift.)
Anyways, thats all from this teenage drama queen. More confessions to come.
- J
